I have not posted for quite a long time... I always have the desire to write something... to share my life... my opinions... and there have been many moments that have gone by since my last post that I felt the inspiration to write something. Sometimes it's a quote that I may have heard from a sermon, other times... while pondering about random things during my 70 mile commute to work I may have an epiphany. Whatever the case, I've been silent. Much of it has to do with laziness, but I think even more than that, I've become convinced that I am not worthy to "teach" others anything.
I've always known that there was a flaw in my thinking. I've already identified that there is a difference between knowing about God and actually knowing God... the problem is I didn't internalize it. Too often has someone come to me asking a question about the Orthodox faith... and I make it my mission to answer them with book knowledge, often times referring to St. Google... and there the problem lies. We are a fast food nation... we go into the drive thru hungry for knowledge about God. We want to know why this and not that? Why infant baptism? Why prayers for the departed and intercession of saints? And when we ask our questions, we expect a well-formulated response as quick as we get our McNuggets and diet soda.
True knowledge of God doesn't come easily. When examining myself, I see the lack of true knowledge I have. I do not fast, I do not read scriptures regularly, and I struggle to pray... these 3 things are monumentally important to a Christian if they wish to know Christ. Knowledge of God is life changing... when encountering truth it should make an impact, not remain as head knowledge.
My posts in the future will focus on these revelations and perhaps the knowledge I gain from addressing these issues.
1 comment:
I believe you may be making progress in that you are aware of your contradiction and are at least contemplating and presumably acting in positive ways for example this blog and opening to feedback and improvement. I think at times the world quite often works against us but of course we have choices. I often ask myself why I keep doing things that might work to the negative but again there are unknown elements that could be affecting us. I think in general however you are on a good track and I wish you well. I keep journals that help me in my own existential searching.
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