I have not posted for quite a long time... I always have the desire to write something... to share my life... my opinions... and there have been many moments that have gone by since my last post that I felt the inspiration to write something. Sometimes it's a quote that I may have heard from a sermon, other times... while pondering about random things during my 70 mile commute to work I may have an epiphany. Whatever the case, I've been silent. Much of it has to do with laziness, but I think even more than that, I've become convinced that I am not worthy to "teach" others anything.
I've always known that there was a flaw in my thinking. I've already identified that there is a difference between knowing about God and actually knowing God... the problem is I didn't internalize it. Too often has someone come to me asking a question about the Orthodox faith... and I make it my mission to answer them with book knowledge, often times referring to St. Google... and there the problem lies. We are a fast food nation... we go into the drive thru hungry for knowledge about God. We want to know why this and not that? Why infant baptism? Why prayers for the departed and intercession of saints? And when we ask our questions, we expect a well-formulated response as quick as we get our McNuggets and diet soda.
True knowledge of God doesn't come easily. When examining myself, I see the lack of true knowledge I have. I do not fast, I do not read scriptures regularly, and I struggle to pray... these 3 things are monumentally important to a Christian if they wish to know Christ. Knowledge of God is life changing... when encountering truth it should make an impact, not remain as head knowledge.
My posts in the future will focus on these revelations and perhaps the knowledge I gain from addressing these issues.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Fun with liturgical songs part 1
So I know I haven't been posting very often. My brain hasn't shutdown, I'm just trying to figure out the direction I'd like to take my blog... but knowing me there will be no direction and I will continue rambling as usual.
Anyway, I woke up early this morning and figured I'd have a little fun w/ my PC doing some recordings. Sound quality isn't all that great... no professional stuff here people =) Hope you like it!
Krupa Cheyyaname
Hruyjumathi kalkkirulil dyuthi yulavayi
Maathru vishudha
Jananee Parishudha
Anyway, I woke up early this morning and figured I'd have a little fun w/ my PC doing some recordings. Sound quality isn't all that great... no professional stuff here people =) Hope you like it!
Krupa Cheyyaname
Hruyjumathi kalkkirulil dyuthi yulavayi
Maathru vishudha
Jananee Parishudha
Friday, December 19, 2008
Shimo Prayers
Recently I have been trying to be more consistent in my prayer life. I think all of us, no matter how 'advanced' we are as Christians, fall and fail at a consistent prayer cycle. I recently purchased The Book of Common Prayer of the Syrian Church and it has been a transforming book. Although I still struggle with consistency, my mind has become more attentive and my prayers more meaningful.
This book encompasses the full prayer cycle, all 7 prayers of the day for each day of the week in the Syrian tradition, which our church follows. Currently I am trying to do a consistent Sapro (morning) prayer for each day. In doing these prayers, I have come to realize the weakness and incompleteness of my own personal prayers.
My typical personal prayers consist of confessing my sins, repentance, praying for friends, family and for the world. All of this however amounts to about 10 minutes... of course the point of prayer is not to make it long and wordy. Jesus admonishes those who pray verbosely for the sake of doing it or to show their holiness to others. My point is that I feel that I owe the creator, the Lord of the Watchers, a bit more of my time and that I have much more to pray about.
Praying for the departed, praying for the church, blessing the Virgin Mother and the saints, remembering the martyrs, even remembering the Old Testament prophets are all included in these prayers. How often do we miss such things when we do our own personal prayers?
Even the language used in this book is full of meaning and makes you have great appreciation for our liturgical life. I will leave you with a couple quotes from the Sapro of Friday.
'The Lord of the Watchers descended and dwelt in the virgin Mary and took pure flesh from her; the heavens are full of him and the earth is too small for his majesty and yet the lap of Mary carried him, halleluia, blessed is he whose mother prays to him, that he may have mercy on the world.'
'On the summit of the cross the Jews made a wine-press and pressed in it the grape of blessing; they pressed it but they did not taste of it; the holy Church received it and every day she takes her pleasure in it, halleluia, and her children drink of it and take their pleasure in it forever.'
This book encompasses the full prayer cycle, all 7 prayers of the day for each day of the week in the Syrian tradition, which our church follows. Currently I am trying to do a consistent Sapro (morning) prayer for each day. In doing these prayers, I have come to realize the weakness and incompleteness of my own personal prayers.
My typical personal prayers consist of confessing my sins, repentance, praying for friends, family and for the world. All of this however amounts to about 10 minutes... of course the point of prayer is not to make it long and wordy. Jesus admonishes those who pray verbosely for the sake of doing it or to show their holiness to others. My point is that I feel that I owe the creator, the Lord of the Watchers, a bit more of my time and that I have much more to pray about.
Praying for the departed, praying for the church, blessing the Virgin Mother and the saints, remembering the martyrs, even remembering the Old Testament prophets are all included in these prayers. How often do we miss such things when we do our own personal prayers?
Even the language used in this book is full of meaning and makes you have great appreciation for our liturgical life. I will leave you with a couple quotes from the Sapro of Friday.
'The Lord of the Watchers descended and dwelt in the virgin Mary and took pure flesh from her; the heavens are full of him and the earth is too small for his majesty and yet the lap of Mary carried him, halleluia, blessed is he whose mother prays to him, that he may have mercy on the world.'
'On the summit of the cross the Jews made a wine-press and pressed in it the grape of blessing; they pressed it but they did not taste of it; the holy Church received it and every day she takes her pleasure in it, halleluia, and her children drink of it and take their pleasure in it forever.'
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
A softened heart
My parish has been going through quite a bit of change recently, most of the change centered around our new church building construction project. We have a new building under way, a completely redesigned website (www.stgregoriosphila.org) which is still under construction as of this writing, our vicar has retired from his profession and is taking even more responsibility and action within the parish, the youth are getting opportunities to become vibrant again.
Among all this change, I feel, especially after today, that I have been missing something important. Today a man called our church and I answered the phone. His intention was to talk to the priest for some guidance. I explained the current situation, that our church building is currently under construction and so the number he called isn't the number to reach him at. I continued on by asking how I can help him.
I came to know that he is an elderly man who belongs to the Greek Orthodox church. He explained to me how 2 and a half years ago, his son had passed away. I wanted to immediately offer my condolences, but he cut me off and continued on. 25 days after his son had passed away, he was sitting at home in a chair with his head on the desk mourning the death of his son. A small while later, he heard a couple footsteps approaching, and he raised his head to look for who was coming. At that moment, he saw his departed son standing before him, and there was a great light coming from behind him.
I started to get a bit skeptical with this man's story, but he continued on as if he had read my thoughts. He said he wouldn't play around with the name of his departed son and that he wasn't making the story up. I had no reason not to believe the man; he was convinced of his personal experience and therefore wasn't making anything up. I'm sure the Apostle Thomas felt the same way when hearing of the resurrection of Christ from the others, at first feeling a bit of skepticism and yet at the same time believing because the Apostles had no reason to lie.
Anyway, the gentleman who called continued on. He was reading the Bible recently and read about Satan being a deceiver, how he approaches us at times in sheep's clothing. He began thinking to himself, perhaps his experience with his son was something the devil conjured up, something to misguide him. He wanted to speak to the priest to know if this really was of God or of the Devil. The man was yearning to know not only WHY but WHO?
I had given him our priest's cell phone number and he thanked me. Before hanging up however, he asked me for my personal opinion. He told me that the experience had brought him closer to God and so I answered that the devil would have had no gain in such an experience. The man became more dependent on Christ, more devout, and more prayerful, so I said it was from God. The man was elated, saying that I've made his day. Obviously the man was desperate to hear those words... even from someone like me, who is not a professional, not a part of the clergy... never been trained in any sort of counseling, just a sinful layman who is unfit to be a child of God.
The man was very happy. He just wanted to ask one more question. Why? I simply answered "because God loves you". The man suddenly broke into tears and couldn't even piece words together. He had a heavy Greek accent and was already having issues in forming sentences in English... now even his thoughts were lost, or so I thought. He said over and over "Yes, that's right... God loves me... God loves me."
In asking his own priest, the priest honestly answered "I don't know". I guess I could have answered the same thing, but it just seemed right to say those words. He again repeated that it's been 2 and a half years. I offered my condolences and he immediately told me not to do so. He reminded me that we are Orthodox, our faith is that he is alive... that once again they will be united. Although the temporary departure is painful, the man had hope and truly is waiting for the day he gets to see his son again.
At that moment, I realized his thoughts were very coherent indeed. He truly believes his faith, not just by word but by thought and deed. He truly is waiting to be united with the Son and his son. He once again thanked me, crying tears of painful joy, and we said our goodbyes. The conversation stayed in my mind for a while... and I began thinking to myself... this is what church is about.
Among all this change, I feel, especially after today, that I have been missing something important. Today a man called our church and I answered the phone. His intention was to talk to the priest for some guidance. I explained the current situation, that our church building is currently under construction and so the number he called isn't the number to reach him at. I continued on by asking how I can help him.
I came to know that he is an elderly man who belongs to the Greek Orthodox church. He explained to me how 2 and a half years ago, his son had passed away. I wanted to immediately offer my condolences, but he cut me off and continued on. 25 days after his son had passed away, he was sitting at home in a chair with his head on the desk mourning the death of his son. A small while later, he heard a couple footsteps approaching, and he raised his head to look for who was coming. At that moment, he saw his departed son standing before him, and there was a great light coming from behind him.
I started to get a bit skeptical with this man's story, but he continued on as if he had read my thoughts. He said he wouldn't play around with the name of his departed son and that he wasn't making the story up. I had no reason not to believe the man; he was convinced of his personal experience and therefore wasn't making anything up. I'm sure the Apostle Thomas felt the same way when hearing of the resurrection of Christ from the others, at first feeling a bit of skepticism and yet at the same time believing because the Apostles had no reason to lie.
Anyway, the gentleman who called continued on. He was reading the Bible recently and read about Satan being a deceiver, how he approaches us at times in sheep's clothing. He began thinking to himself, perhaps his experience with his son was something the devil conjured up, something to misguide him. He wanted to speak to the priest to know if this really was of God or of the Devil. The man was yearning to know not only WHY but WHO?
I had given him our priest's cell phone number and he thanked me. Before hanging up however, he asked me for my personal opinion. He told me that the experience had brought him closer to God and so I answered that the devil would have had no gain in such an experience. The man became more dependent on Christ, more devout, and more prayerful, so I said it was from God. The man was elated, saying that I've made his day. Obviously the man was desperate to hear those words... even from someone like me, who is not a professional, not a part of the clergy... never been trained in any sort of counseling, just a sinful layman who is unfit to be a child of God.
The man was very happy. He just wanted to ask one more question. Why? I simply answered "because God loves you". The man suddenly broke into tears and couldn't even piece words together. He had a heavy Greek accent and was already having issues in forming sentences in English... now even his thoughts were lost, or so I thought. He said over and over "Yes, that's right... God loves me... God loves me."
In asking his own priest, the priest honestly answered "I don't know". I guess I could have answered the same thing, but it just seemed right to say those words. He again repeated that it's been 2 and a half years. I offered my condolences and he immediately told me not to do so. He reminded me that we are Orthodox, our faith is that he is alive... that once again they will be united. Although the temporary departure is painful, the man had hope and truly is waiting for the day he gets to see his son again.
At that moment, I realized his thoughts were very coherent indeed. He truly believes his faith, not just by word but by thought and deed. He truly is waiting to be united with the Son and his son. He once again thanked me, crying tears of painful joy, and we said our goodbyes. The conversation stayed in my mind for a while... and I began thinking to myself... this is what church is about.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Primers for the noobs (including me) =)
Many Orthodox people, when wanting to provide resources to those who want to learn about the true faith, end up suggesting "The Orthodox Way" and "The Orthodox Church" as the first literary resources to go to. I however have a different opinion. The aforementioned books are fantastic reads, however they may be too "academic" for many. I've been reading over a 4 book series by Clark Carlton.
The Life: The Orthodox Doctrine of Salvation
The Way: What Every Protestant Should Know About the Orthodox Church
The Faith: Understanding Orthodox Christianity
The Truth: What Every Roman Catholic Should Know About the Orthodox Church
Although the theology presented may not be "deep" enough for some, I think Carlton does a fantastic job in introducing the faith in a very readable fashion. It's a good "primer" if you will.
The Life: The Orthodox Doctrine of Salvation
The Way: What Every Protestant Should Know About the Orthodox Church
The Faith: Understanding Orthodox Christianity
The Truth: What Every Roman Catholic Should Know About the Orthodox Church
Although the theology presented may not be "deep" enough for some, I think Carlton does a fantastic job in introducing the faith in a very readable fashion. It's a good "primer" if you will.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Among other Christians
"Orthodoxy was finally a theology big enough to dignify the human soul" - Barnabas Powell (probably not famous, but a fantastic quote nonetheless)
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